Q: When did you know you wanted to be a mom?
A: Even as a little girl, I always knew I wanted to be someone’s momma someday — when I played with my dolls, I was always the “mom,” and I loved babysitting and taking care of little ones.
Q: What has been the best surprise of motherhood?
A: My biggest surprise in motherhood is all the little moments of magic that I get to experience with my daughters. When they’re babies, the sweetness is more obvious. As they get older, so do I, and in the process I’ve become more structured and serious, but I still get to be in my skin for all their moments — experiencing them feel pride in something they’ve done for the first time, or shock and joy in the moment they overcome a fear. I didn’t realize that the magic just keeps coming.
Q: What has been the biggest challenge of motherhood?
A: For so long, I was so vigilant and completely worn down because I wasn’t taking any timeouts. My biggest challenge these days is being consistent in my parenting, no matter what or who tries to influence my decisions. Accepting what is out of my control and trusting my inner knowing has become key. Also, my girls are very close in age, but very different in personality. Learning their little individual personalities has been the most challenging and rewarding experience.
Q: How has motherhood changed you?
A: Motherhood has changed me in so many ways, but one way I identify with most is how soft and capable I feel as a woman since being a mother. Motherhood has really helped me live by the “and”s not the “or”s of life! I can be a good role model and be sexy and confident, I can make mistakes and show my daughters how to overcome them. Motherhood constantly shows me that it’s OK to evolve, to grow, to change, to learn, to be accountable, tolerant, patient, loving — it’s made me a forever student, and for that I am truly grateful.
Q: What's your greatest strength or source of confidence as a mom? In other words, what are you really good at?
A: I’m really good at expressing myself and allowing my daughters to do the same, whether it be through their outfit for the day, a good cry (aka tantrum) or putting on some music and dancing. We often sit and talk about our feelings and practice breathing exercises. When it comes to regulating our emotions, I do my conscious best to lead by example.
Q: When mom life takes the wind out of you, what little rituals pull you together and help you reset?
A: I always go to meditation — sometimes it’s a 5-minute stretch meditation, or a
walking and dancing meditation on the beach, or a guided meditation. Every once in a blue moon, a long, good cry in the shower while I pray. And music! A song that fits the feels is IT.
Q: What's the best motherhood advice you've ever received, or a message you wish you'd had on your bathroom mirror when you were a new mom?
A: You can only love your children as deeply as you love yourself.
Q: Tag a mom friend you admire, and tell us why. Hype it up!
A: I’d like to tag them all, but I gotta go with Kara Bosworth. Not only is she an amazing momma, she’s a solid friend, too. She’s smart, logical and loving, and I will never forget a major learning-curve moment I experienced while our daughters were playing at the park. Her daughter, Decker, asked me to hold her up on the monkey bars and I casually said “I’m not strong like daddy.” Decker, with all her wit and girl power, fired back “or strong like mommy — my mommy is strong too, sometimes stronger than my daddy.” That moment revealed one of my deep false narratives and reminded me to shift my way of thinking in order to teach my daughters how strong they are … just like me, and like all women.